And another thing...

What's with Fucking Lionel Richie? Sure, Faith No More did a cool cover of a Commodores song, but give me, a die-hard Saints supporter, a fucking break.
I know a lot of other people had ideas about bands, but I'm astounded that the Weddoes were not even considered.
They reunited to play Grand Final Eve at the Palace, and Mick Thomas is a recognised DIE HARD SAINTS SUPPORTER.
"Under The Clocks", a classic Melbourne song, directly references the Saints getting done at again at the MCG.
Coincidence? No. We get done all the fucking time at the MCG. So probably not my first selection for a pre-Grand Final song at a Saints' Grand Final, but you can't doubt the Weddoes' commitment to Footy.
Plus, the crowd would love their shit. Their Fucking Great Shit: "Father's Day". "Monday's Experts" (another FOOTBALL SONG). "A Ticket in Tatts" (a Dane Swan tribute, if you need). "Scorn of the Women" (AFL Policy, nyah, nyah).
But they went with Lionel Fucking Richie.
So I got there late today.
Lessened my eventual pain (though I stayed to the end - if I was concerned about pain I obviously should have left earlier).
AFL: Next time the Weddoes do a Grand Final Eve gig, book them for the next day. Not only is it courteous, they'll rock your socks off your sock-covered balls.
PS: The opportunity's lost this time 'round, but next time Collingwood wins a Grand Final (let's hope it's not for a while), once the other team's fans have left the ground, it's a victimless crime if the MCG gets attacked by Muslim Vampires. That's all I'm sayin'.

Oh when the Saints, get ****** in the ****

I just sent the following missive to Mr Andrew Demetriou:

"Dear Mr Demetriou
Having now been intimately involved with the football goings-on of the last week and a day (as a Saints member), please let me give you my opinion: a drawn Grand Final should go into extra time to allow the result to be determined on the day.
I say this because, as a die-hard Saints supporter who has now been to three winless Grand Finals in the last 372 or so days, I would have MUCH preferred to have lost last week in extra time than to have gone through this hopeless charade in the past week, only to have an even worse loss today.
I don't care what happened back in 1977 (I lie, of course, because my first memory is from 1977, and it's of my Dad taking me to see Star Wars at the cinema (which was fancy back then), but not taking my younger brother because he might be scared of Chewbacca...but we're talking footy now...)
I know it's "tradition", but people had nothing to do in 1977 (plus it was North Melbourne and Collingwood: Two Dud Teams (no disrespect intended - my team just lost a Grand Final today, I'm sure you understand)).
But this week, weddings were cancelled or moved, the women's elite road cycling race was ignored, families were abandoned by Saints supporters who have little time as it is, and even fans were abandoned (by the AFL: BAM!!!)
All so that Collingwood supporters could feel the much the same as they would have if they had won last week (although there's a good argument they would have felt better last week, which would have been a great win in the circumstances) and ALSO so that Saints supporters could feel much, much worse, and waste a lot of time and money to boot.
In case you're interested, I am super-demoralised. I'm wishing Lenny had not kicked that point last week, so we would have instead lost by one point, and taken solace from our ability to come from behind and almost snatch victory, instead of being completely annihilated in a "replay" one week later. And I mean no disrespect to the players: today was just one day. But, man, Collingwood killed us today, and there was no need to put the players and the supporters through that - if the rules allowed for extra time in a Grand Final.
For the sake of future fans in future finals, please Mr AFL: Change the Rules.
If it helps, and for the record, my son (a Saints member all his life) plays soccer.
And they have extra time in soccer.
And as of today I'm a lot more interested in soccer myself (I'm not threatening. I'm just, y'know, saying. The obvious).
Thanks for reading (or having one of your minions read).
Rile(star)"

Still. GO SAINTS.

Ebony and Irony

Is it irony that my last post was about the Saints winning one, and my very next post is just before the Real Saints* hopefully win their own?
And while we're on the topic: Is it ironic to use the word "ironic" in a deliberately non-ironic situation?
I submit it would be if you were a Master Of Irony, trying to win the Irony Man Competition, and as your closing statement you deliberately say something you think is ironic that is Not In Fact Ironic.
THAT would be IRONIC!
Coincidentally (though not ironically), that would have to win any Irony Man Competition.
Take that, Ms Morissette! (Loved your work in Dogma, by the way. Call me.)
Anyhoo, I guess I should mention that I’m back on the Rantwagon, mah peeps.
I’ve had a lot of rant-juice building up in my rant duct, and it’s time to Let Loose.
I could say that the reason I haven't posted for a super-long time is because I was waiting for the Saints to get into another Grand Final, or because I'm waiting for Sirmarco to post first (but he's taking fricking forEVER), or even because I need to spend time with my family instead of ranting into the very thin air that is the little-read and over-populated blogosphere.
But let's just blame it on Muslim Vampires. Or Twitter.
Whatever the reason, I'm back.
GO SAINTS.
*No disrespect to the New Orleans Saints, of course, I just have a deep and abiding link to the Saints of St Kilda, both in bayside Melbourne AND in the outlying Scottish island.

Faceblocked

I've finally done it. After years of bi-annually checking my Facebook account, I've deactivated it. I'm free! Now I can just concentrate on my real passions - YouFace and Twatter. What? You don't twat? Might also give me some time to post on this blogging device...

It's All Saints to me!

The Saints finally win one!
Yes, I know they're not the mighty Saints from St Kilda, who...well...recently failed to win one.
But it counts.
Just as a win by the St George Dragons in Rugby League would count, or by the Saints of Southampton FC (y'know, if they were still in the Premier League...)
Or anyone on St Patrick’s Day.
They all count as a win for me.
Go (New Orleans) Saints!

I didn't do it!

There's a lot of angst in my hometown lately about classic music venues shutting down, and rightly so.
The big news this week was the closure of The Tote in Collingwood, followed a few days later by an announcement that The Arthouse on Elizabeth Street would also be closing.
It got me thinking about the great bands I'd seen at The Tote, like the Dirty Three and SixFtHick...and then I remembered that I had also played at The Tote!
As well as The Arthouse...
Hmmmm...
Other places our band had played included the Punter's Club in Fitzroy (closed), the 9th Ward in Flinders Lane (gone), Joey's in South Yarra and St Kilda (both shut), the Greyhound in St Kilda (no bands anymore), et cetera, et cetera...
We did have our CD launch in the Espy Gershwin Room, though, and that's still kicking on.
I, uh, hope I didn't just kill it, though...

Back to the Future's Past...Today!

OK, OK, OK!!! (the last "OK" was a yell, but sadly my acronym was already in capital letters).
One of my few readers got a little uppity recently, saying something like "Why don't you write on your blog any more?"
I KNOW. Uppity to the max!
The answer is clearly something to do with laziness, but my New Year's Resolution is...oh, I can't be bothered going through that. Anyhoo, here's my latest post-age (Pauly Shore-style) re: things that stick in or about my craw-area.
First, Nicholas D. Kristof recetly wrote about Religion and Women in the context of the recent "Parliament of the World’s Religions" right here in the land Down Under:

“Women are prevented from playing a full and equal role in many faiths, creating an environment in which violations against women are justified,” former President Jimmy Carter noted in a speech last month to the Parliament of the World’s Religions in Australia.
“The belief that women are inferior human beings in the eyes of God,” Mr. Carter continued, “gives excuses to the brutal husband who beats his wife, the soldier who rapes a woman, the employer who has a lower pay scale for women employees, or parents who decide to abort a female embryo.”
Mr. Carter, who sees religion as one of the “basic causes of the violation of women’s rights,” is a member of The Elders, a small council of retired leaders brought together by Nelson Mandela. The Elders are focusing on the role of religion in oppressing women, and they have issued a joint statement calling on religious leaders to “change all discriminatory practices within their own religions and traditions.”

Nice one, Old Un-Sexist Dudes. And for all those thinking "Why should I ever listen to Godless Heathens and/or Jimmy Carter":

"The Elders are neither irreligious nor rabble-rousers. They include Archbishop Desmond Tutu, and they begin their meetings with a moment for silent prayer."

Ahhhh. So they're still a bit MeNtAl.
But at least they're on the right track.
In another article designed to re-disestablish (please don't get on your anti"disestablish"mentarianism high horse) one's faith in this crazy old world of ours and the...what's the best way to put it..."vermin" that populate it: 'Greed culture' killing planet, it appears that the average American consumes more than his or her weight in products each day (and we all know the average American is quite rotund, so we're talking a lot of products here):

"In its annual report, Worldwatch Institute says the cult of consumption and greed could wipe out any gains from government action on climate change or a shift to a clean energy economy."

Nice one, world.
Unsurprisingly, I've got some ideas, at least for our neck of the woods.
I'll get to that another time...