Tuesday, November 30, 2010

How to watch TV without watching TV

Continuing on from my last post about our mentalist one-week trip to the States, the day after the Rally we braved a train to New York (despite it being scary and Halloween), for what turned out to be a 5-day TV/BeerFest (without really watching any TV ... and drinking a lot of Beer).
First order of business: seeing both Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert in Washington DC was clearly not enough - we were determined to go to tapings of The Daily Show and The Colbert Report, too.
We had hoped to go to one or both shows when we were in New York back in 2007, but they just happened to start a writer's strike THE DAY WE TOUCHED DOWN IN THE U.S., so we were unable, that time around (note my sad face and the "No Show Today" sign in the window in the photo below, which would stay in the window at least until we left the country):

This time, in 2010, was our chance to make amends.
The main problem, of course, was actually getting tickets. Although the shows are free, they are ticketed.
Now, I thought that, since we were making the effort to fly half-way around the world to attend their Rally to Restore Sanity/March to Keep Fear Alive, the least Messrs Stewart and Colbert could do would be to let us attend a taping or two whilst in New York. Plus, Australians are so, like, adorable, right?
I thought wrong. And no.
E-mails went unanswered, a tweet to @ColbertReport of "Hey! My wife and I are flying from Australia for the March. We're AFRAID we won't also get tix to the Report - little help?" also received no love. And, according to Comedy Central's website, they don't even open snail mail. So it seemed that the ONLY way to get tix was via the websites themselves, at http://www.thedailyshow.com/tickets and http://www.colbertnation.com/tickets.
Unfortunately, every time I logged on to those sites, they reinforced the lack of fortune and said "Unfortunately, there are no tickets available to see The Colbert Report/The Daily Show with Jon Stewart at this time. Check back soon to secure your tickets or sign-up below to receive e-mails letting you know when new dates open up" (just as they probably will NOW if you hit those links). After many attempts I naturally concluded the internet was broken, because there were NEVER tickets available.
However, and in a reversal of the Fortune-Lack, a few weeks before we left I discovered (like I'm Magellan) a Twitter account that constantly updates when tickets become available: @dailytix. Thanks to this service, and my near-constant monitoring of Twitter (just kidding, boss, if you read this!! Everyone else: I'm not kidding), we managed to get tickets to The Daily Show about 2 weeks before we left for the States. And then, whilst still in DC just before we caught our train to New York, we managed to score two tickets to The Colbert Report for the show being taped the VERY NEXT DAY!
So, after arriving in New York, checking into the Bowery Hotel in the East Village - a great place in a great location, just one block from the former CBGBs - and then partaking in the Greenwich Halloween Parade and many, many microbrews, we recovered on the Monday and made our way to The Report's studio on 54th Street. Thanks to arriving pretty early (around 4:30pm for a 7pm taping), we were something like 20th in line, and dead-certs to get in (although we had tickets, they overbook (since they're free, people tend to not turn up), so they still recommend that you get there early if you want to be sure about getting in).

For an idea of what to expect (e.g., in the queue, once clearing security, in the actual studio), I recommend reading one of these highly informative reporTs, all of which involve stories better than mine:
The warm-up guy for us was the very funny and charming Julian McCullough, who asked if anyone was from out of town. Our hands shot up, and we surprised him by apparently being the first Australians in the history of the show to proudly announce "Yes, We Are Convicts", before he had a chance to.
A very cool thing about attending the tapings is that, before every show, Stephen comes out and allows the audience to ask him questions, about anything, out of character. There are some examples of very good questions in the reporTs above, but I did manage to get his attention and wittily ask: "Would you ever think about getting John Travolta to fly a planeload of your audience out to Australia?" To which he frustratingly replied, with a twinkle in his eye: "You seem to know the way!" and moved on to the next question.
NOOOOOOO!!! I really wanted to know if he would think about coming to Australia! Plus I forgot to mention that we flew over just for the Rally (like I've told everyone else I've ever met)!!
However, I got a hint of why he may have moved on from my question so quickly the next night at the taping of The Daily Show, when another Australian in the audience right behind me boringly asked Jon "When are you coming to Australia?" YAWN!! Can't you Australians think of anything else to ask? Especially since (as we were told by staff when we were in the queue for The Report) they have had at least one Australian in the audience EVERY NIGHT since The Colbert Report began!
So if I can offer some advice: if you're Australian, don't even think about asking "When are you coming to Australia?" (even if asked cleverly and topically like me) - ask something interesting about Watership Down or Large Fruit-based sculptures like the ladies above.
Anyhoo - the shows were great. The episode of the Colbert Report was the first one after the Rally, which started with Stephen doing his "Steph Colbert's Hobby Hovel" in front of a green screen (right in front of us - the studio really is small, and we were only about 4 rows back, so we were super-close) and we all had to practise and then perform the song "It's the Greatest, Strongest Country in the World" ("From North to South and East to West and diagonally!") along with Stephen when he went through some Rally highlights, as well as at the end. Plus Stephen looked right at me after one of his jokes, knowing that I get his stuff, and we also both wear glasses.
And The Daily Show we went to the following night was the live election special (on 2 November - the day of the mid-term elections) which was also very exciting. Although the guests weren't super-famous for either show, at The Daily Show taping we were blessed with seeing not 1, not 2, not 3, not 5, but FOUR of the regular correspondents: Aasif Mandvi, Olivia Munn, Jason Jones and John Oliver (wearing his green-screen suit)! We just needed a Wyatt Cenac or a Sam Bee for a full house! (though we did run into Kristen Schaal in The Pony Bar in Hell's Kitchen after the show - did you know she's a horse? Incidentally, The Pony Bar is one of many, many great bars in NY with many, many microbrews on tap - check it: http://www.theponybar.com )
So, anyway, after the two tapings, and speaking to some of the legends involved, I think I can very safely and humbly say: "TV Cha-Ching!!!"
In all seriousness, it's great to watch both the shows now and picture how it all fits together behind-the-scenes (especially when we get glimpses of the scary security guys who just watch the audience the whole time ready to open up multiple cans of W-A. For a comedy show, they sure look like they want to dismember some audience members).
Our TV Adventures didn't stop there, though.
The same night we saw The Colbert Report, we managed to then get into another show - the script reading of a movie based on Glenn Beck's book "The Overton Window" - at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theater (which, since we're speaking about TV, was started by, amongst others, Amy Poehler, and includes such alumni as The Daily Show's Rob Corrdry and Ed Helms). They promised a special guest, and they delivered when Chris Meloni (Elliott from Law and Order: SVU, as well as a scary man from Oz (the prison drama, not the colloquialism referring to Peter Allen)) walked out and sat 3 metres away from us!
TV Cha-ching!
The next day at our hotel we were accompanied into the elevator by a dashing and familiar young man. Tash couldn't help herself and simply asked: "You're in something aren't you?" He was gracious and suggested helpfully that he was currently in the TV series "Bored to Death (questioning shrug?)", whereupon Tash wrinkled her nose and said That's Not It. He took it in his stride and was very friendly, though, and told us he loved Melbourne and would live there if he could (Go Melbs)! Back in our hotel room we fell back on good ol' reliable IMDB and discovered he was Jason Schwartzman (and that he'd been in The Darjeeling Limited, which is what Tash recognised him from, among many others things)!!
TV Cha-ching!
We also went to another comedy show another night (at Comic Strip Live - although it seemed like a bit of a tourist trap, they claim it's the "legendary home of Jerry Seinfeld, Eddie Murphy, Paul Reiser, Carol Leifer, Chris Rock, Adam Sandler, Ray Romano and more") and Judah Friedlander from 30 Rock was the first of the infinite number of comics they had on. He actually wasn't very funny, but he's on TV!
TV Ka-Boing!
Plus William Stephenson, who played the bus driver in the first episode of Louie CK's show "Louie", was the MC.
TV Mini-Ching!
Ummm...and we also went to Carrie's apartment and Magnolia Bakery in the West Village...
TV A-hem!
The New York Comedy Festival also just happened to be on while we there, and we were tempted to extend our trip by an extra day just so that we could see Joel McHale's (of Community and The Soup fame) stand-up show at Carnegie Hall on the night we left, before realising that New York is the worst place in the world to say "We'll just extend our holiday each day there's something we'd like to go to" ... and so we let it go.
But basically what I'm saying, in case I didn't make it clear, is that we managed to squeeze in a lot of TV experiences in our 5 days in New York without really watching any Cathode Rays. You could say we had a Cathode Rays-Ban!
I am very glad that my writings have led me to type that sentence.
Before I wrap it all up, we also managed to squeeze in some movie experiences, combined with a liberal helping of AWESOME, by hitting the New York edition of Lebowski Fest at Brooklyn Bowl the night before we left (this is something we actually did extend the trip for).

I only found out about Lebowski Fest last year, and never imagined that one day I would actually be able to see, in the flesh, the many people dressed up as The Dude, Valkyrie Maude and Baby Nihilists, the many people drinking white russians ... and bowling.
If you're interested, this is a link to a news item about the night we were there: http://vimeo.com/16722086
The organisers also booked the obligatory cock rock band to finish off the night: Diamondsnake.
And yes, that's Moby in the picture on the left (not just a dude who looks like Moby) shredding on the guitar. We also recognised the bassist, but couldn't quite place him, until we realised it was Dave Hill, who was also one of the "stars" of The Overton Window script reading at the UCBT: Craziness!
The lead singer also plays in a Bee Gees tribute band: Tragedy!
Seriously - "Tragedy" is the name of the band.
Gold.
Below is a video of Diamondsnake playing "D-Snake Riot" that night:



I could go on (for example, our A380 plane was mysteriously absent from LA airport on Friday 5 November), but I think you've read enough.
Congratulations - you are an Achiever - and take 'er easy.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Rally to Restore Virginiaty

We're baaack!
Actually, we've been back for a week, but I've been tired and sick and also my record for punctual posting is pretty pathetic. Pwnage (I've wanted to use that expression for a while).
Nonetheless, it was great trip. It was, in fact, the biggest television experience of our lives, magically achieved without watching a single pixel of television.
But first: The Rally! The entire reason for our trip was to go to the Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear in Washington DC.
When it was first announced by Jon (and then Stephen), I originally thought "I wish I lived in America, because that would be great to go to." By the next night, I had seriously started thinking about flying over (but shook my head, slapped my own face (Jane's Addiction-style) and said "pull yourself together, rilestar!") By the third night, I had checked my work schedule (I could fit in a week's holiday), checked with the wife (she wouldn't mind a quick trip to the States and back), and the parents and parents-in-law (who confirmed they could look after the kids or at least periodically re-fill their food bowls). A week later, we booked our tickets, and then on Friday 29 October, we flew to LA on a big Qantas A380 (more on that later) and walked into our hotel room in DC 26 hours later (but still on the 29th of October, thanks to the miracles of Science!)
We had no idea how big (or small) the Rally would be, but the lady I was sitting next to on the plane from LA to DC was also going, as well as another couple nearby who overheard us talking about it, which made 5 people per 4 square metres in that piece of real estate alone. Then everyone except for two people on the shuttle bus from Washington Dulles Airport (technically in Virginia - hence the witty title to this post) had flown in just for the rally, and when we went out in Georgetown that night (still not having slept a wink since leaving Melbourne), the first guy we sat down next to in our first of many bars was also going to the rally. Back in the hotel, a couple we chatted to in the elevator were also going.
So, based on our market research, it was going to be Big, and we would need to get there early.
We got up late.
We also then struggled to get on a train - the first two that came by were completely chockas - they couldn't spare a square! Finally, when the third one came by, we begged and pleaded with the squashed commuters to let us on - "We flew all the way from Australia for this!!!" I recall someone crying hysterically - and a kind and generous and large and bearded man in the doorway wearing a T-shirt saying "Han Shot First" allowed us to squeeze on, despite the protestations of a skinny and unkind and bearded woman about 10 metres away from the doorway.
That said, we were luckier than the many people living in surrounding States (like Maryland, Delaware and VIRGINIA), who were similarly unable to get on trains and who didn't have the option of walking like we were about to ... or a large Star Wars fan called Bill who would allow them on to His train).
So we arrived at the Mall a little late. And the closest we were able to get to the stage (at least until the Rally finished) was just over 7th Street (and the stage was around about 3rd St).
But it was still gooooood.
As I will allow my video to demonstrate:


This is also my pretty shaky report for Boxcutters, recorded not with a camcorder, as one would expect, but with my eeepc laptop's webcam. Enjoy the choice I made:


(If anyone wants me to film and edit your wedding or bar mitzvah, let me know. I'M AVAILABLE).
And since the signs were such a big part of the day (I really regret not getting my ar$e into gear and printing up our Oz-centric signs "I am Australia - and so can you!" and "Dropbears are REAL, people!") this is a link to a hundred of the best: http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/the-100-best-signs-at-the-rally-to-restore-sanity
This has all probably been a lot to take in, and since we left DC (and Virginia) the day after the Rally for New York (New York), I think I'll finish off my stuff about our magical TV adventure in another post.

But it does involve more Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert, in case you're wondering...